Tuesday, October 6, 2015

About Intersexed Children

Intersex, in humans and other animals, is a variation in sex characteristic including chromosomesgonads, or genitals that do not allow an individual to be distinctly identified as male or female. Such variation may involve genital ambiguity, and combinations of chromosomal genotype and sexual phenotype other than XY-male and XX-female.

Intersex infants and children, such as those with ambiguous outer genitalia, may be surgically and/or hormonally altered to create perceived more socially acceptable sex characteristics. However, this is considered controversial, with no firm evidence of good outcomes.
 Such treatments may involve sterilization. Adults, including elite female athletes, have also been subjects of such treatment. Research in the late 20th century indicates a growing medical consensus that diverse intersex bodies are normal—if relatively rare—forms of human biology.

Alice Dreger - Professor of clinical medical humanities and bioethics at the Feinberg School of Medicine in Chicago. This was my stance: Children born with genitals that look funny but work fine should not be surgically altered just because their genital appearance upsets or worries some adult. Big clitorises shouldn't be shortened, and baby boys with very small penises shouldn't be sex-changed just because their phalluses induce Freudian crises of conscience in their caregivers.


Professor Dreger is talking, of course, about intersexchildren, that 1 in 1000 or so babies who are born with genitalia which seem to be neither quite boy nor girl. In some (rarer) cases, intersex people can possess both testicular and ovarian tissue in an ovotestis. Cases of intersex people have been cropping up in the medical literature for centuries (I recall coming across them as a student) and are depicted in medical textbooks naked, in black-and-white, with a bar over their face to cover their "anonymity".


Together with intersex friend Bo Laurent, Alice Dreger founded theIntersex Society of North America. Its purpose was to provide solidarity for intersex people, to realise they are not alone; to campaign to the medical profession for better, more understanding treatment of intersex individuals; and for more acceptance from society for intersex individuals.


Dreger: The problem in intersex care wasn't a problem of gender identity per se. The problem was that, in the service of strict gender norms, people were being cut up, lied to, and made to feel profoundly ashamed of themselves. Bo said it as plainly as she could: Intersex is not primarily about gender identity; it is about shame, secrecy and trauma.







Sunday, October 4, 2015

Sexual Response in Post-Op Transsexual Women - How It Feels

Excerpted from: http://www.tsroadmap.com/



There is a wide range of libidos in postop women, just as in natal women. Some women are very highly sexed, the majority are moderately sexed, and some are asexual and have little libido at all. This section is relevant for those postop women who have healthy libidos, who experience sexual arousals and who desire ongoing sexual fulfillment and orgasms.
 
Most postop women having healthy libidos begin to experience their first postop arousals within a month or two after surgery. After a initial period of low sensations and even numbness, they then experience "turning on" due to engorgement of remaining internal erectile tissue (corpora and spongiosum) that was left during SRS. The arousals produce a feeling of "erection", but one that is different than for guys, since it is inside their bodies.
 

For some postop women, it may take much longer for these arousals to begin, especially if they were inactive sexually and/or asexual prior to SRS due to their gender angst. However, even these postop women will eventually begin to experience genital arousals and the onset of sexual desires if they have active libidos.

Consider the following: "Another factor in sexual function is your endocrine system...After surgery, some women find that their adrenal glands (the other source of testosterone) do not produce enough to provide adequate libido or orgasm. You may require a small amount of supplemental testosterone to regain functioning. The amount required is typically far below the amount that will cause any other unwanted side effects, such as hair growth. Not everyone requires this, but keep in mind that some do."


Many natal women who are having difficulty in feeling turned-on and in achieving orgasms (especially post-menopausal women) are now taking Estratest tablets, which contain a combination of estrogen and small amounts of testosterone. Some post-op women who were experiencing difficulty in arousals and orgasms began using Estratest too, and some report that the therapy helps them. These tablets contain either 1.25 mg or 0.625 mg of estrogens (as in Premarin tablets), but also include a small amount of testosterone in each pill.


In any event, once a postop woman begins experiencing arousals, the nerves in the clitoris and vulvar surfaces become highly sensitized, and sensual and sexy feeling permeate her body. Then, just as during pubertal sexual awakening, she will automatically feel urges to play with her body and to masturbate. The arousals will gradually intensify as her genital area fully heals from the SRS. Masturbation and sexual activity can likely play a role in helping neural regeneration and sensitivity during this period.


There are many ways to masturbate, but one favorite way for girls to do it is to "rub on a pillow". The girl does this by lying face down on her bed, with a firm pillow between her legs. This way she can rub her vulva and clitoris on the pillow while squeezing it, putting pressure on her clit and also being able to thrust and thrash around. At the same time she can play with her breasts and body with her hands. Alternatively, she can rub her clitoris with the fingers of one hand while squeezing her legs and thrashing around to stimulate her body. Girls discover these ways just as automatically as boys discover "jerking off", even though girls have been more secretive about it our society in the past.


While masturbating, the pubertal girl will suddenly begin to experience her first orgasms, and she is then on her way to developing her full sexuality as a woman. In just the same way, the postop woman needs to explore her new sexual anatomy and masturbate, and learn her new sexual responses and experience her first orgasms as a woman - learning what most girls do in their teens during puberty.
This ongoing pubertal aspect of immediate postop life can be very thrilling and exciting, but also very confusing and scary for the woman, much in the same way that the onset of sexual maturity is for any teenager.


For some insights into this process, I highly recommend that you read the very candid webpage by entitled "M -> F Transexual Post-Op Orgasms - A Personal Perspective", by Monica Stewart. Monica's site stresses the need to gain experience with your new sexual responses prior to having intercourse. It is also important to try to get over hang-ups about what's "OK" and what's "naughty". Then too, many woman enjoy experiencing playful anal stimulation, including using sex toys to overcome inhibitions and enhance arousals.


Most women also learn to use fantasies to trigger and enhance arousals and orgasms. Those fantasies can be used during masturbation, and then later used to help heighten one's experiences during intercourse with a lover.


Thus we see that transition and SRS are just the very beginning: They enable the girl enter her new puberty.




Following SRS, the perfunctory feeling of male ejaculation during orgasm is gone forever. Instead, you can build up your sexual arousal to a much higher level without ejaculation bringing things to a halt. It may take more time to reach it, but you can now experience a more powerful orgasm - with the old male ejaculation feeling now replaced by an intense neural discharge and spasm throughout the entire genital area during orgasm.


It feels kind of like you are being gently stimulated with electricity inside and throughout your entire genital region. The experience can vary a lot from orgasm to orgasm in the way in which the "neural halo and spasmodic colors" of the orgasm develop, spread, and feel. It seems almost as if most men so easily and quickly reach ejaculation that they never manage to get "high enough" sexually to trigger this more powerful form of orgasm.


In addition, there are real differences in "body feelings" during lovemaking between the male and female experience (although many of these feelings will be "female" in form for preop TS women too). Most males are usually stimulated visually by their partner's body-appearance. Once aroused, they usually feel a growing "tightness inside" and a desire to "grab and hold and thrust and penetrate". This desire comes on suddenly, and quickly becomes quite overpowering, with most of the sexual sensations coming only from within the penis itself. However, when the release of orgasm occurs, it is usually much more perfunctory than for a woman, being accompanied by a few spurts of semen and a few grunts and that's it. The ejaculation is then followed by quite a sudden letdown and loss of any interest in sexual activity.


The sexual experience for the postop woman is much more "internal" within and throughout her whole body than for a male. The arousal may start in her genitals, but then can spread all through her lower body, especially inside the muscles, and her skin all over her body becomes more sensitized to caressing and touching. Instead of sexual arousal being just in the genitals as in a male, the estrogen seems to also enable a powerful "heat" to fill the woman's whole body once she is aroused - and especially once she is being penetrated. Having this heat come over her in the absence of a partner, and without any satisfaction, can make her feel like "climbing the walls" or "thrashing around in her bed".
 

Since her whole body becomes much more sensitive to touch as she get fully aroused, she is not stimulated so much by her partner's appearance as by the way he (or she) touches her and manipulates her body and the way his (or her) voice sounds. She doesn't feel the hard focused drive to quickly achieve orgasm as do males, but instead feels a desire to let go and thrash around and be "handled" and gradually heighten her erotic feelings. It isn't what she is seeing that counts as much as what she is feeling and hearing and how her body is being manipulated by her partner, as she yields to the wonders of sexual heat and lovemaking. And usually she'll like to take some time to do this and enjoy this, instead of just "rushing for ejaculation" like most guys do.

Sexual Orientation of Transwomen

Excerpted from: http://www.tsroadmap.com/


A somewhat neglected field of research is the sexual orientation of male-to-female transsexual women.  This is actually very surprising given the psychological and social importance of "sex" and sexuality, and it's presumably deliberate incorporation in the term "transsexual".


Even if a woman is known as being a transsexual, a heterosexual inclination is generally expected by society, and other orientation may present problems.


Grossly simplifying things, transsexual women often seem to adopt one of two "safe" options - heterosexual relationships with men, or lesbian relationships with a former female partner or other transsexual women.  Her own true sexual preferences may, or may not, play a role in the option selected.


Apparently about 95% of natal "XX" women consider themselves as being heterosexual.  In comparison, studies of the sexual orientation of post-SRS transsexual women indicate a rather different picture:



Study NameSample SizeHetero-
sexual
LesbianBisexual or
Nonsexual
Wiesbeck & Täschner, 1989 [Note 1]1071?2?
Eicher, Schmitt & Bergner, 19914026 (65%)5 (12.5%)8 (20%) + 1
Ross & Need, 1989141202
Lindemalm, Körlin & Uddenberg, 198613913
Sörensen, 1981a2317 (10 kept SRS secret from partners06
Pfäfflin & Junge, 199042 (13 kept SRS secret from partners)28 (76%)9 (24%)5 (12%)
Wålinder & Thuwe, 1975111100
Schroder17935
TOTAL170119 (70%)19 (11%)32 (19%)

Feminzation Services

Excerpted from: http://www.transvestitelounge.com



One of the first things I came across researching cross-dressing was feminization services. These are places where cross-dressers and transvestites can go and get a male to female makeover. They offer products to buy over the internet but more importantly, they have a place you can go to get help with looking more feminine. 

There will be assistants that know how to feminize men and make them look like women as convincing as possible. If you’re living in a big city, chances are there will be such a service with a branch in that city. Otherwise you could look online for a shop closest to you.


I used to be skeptical towards these sort of services. I thought that men should be able to get feminized at home and that they probably cost a lot more money than you should have to pay. But I’ve become a little more open minded over the last few years and now I feel they are worth considering. So here I’ll tell you why you might want to take a look at these services and why you might deserve to experience the beautiful process of feminization even if it is commercialized.


Beauty parlor for men
Women have been able to experience beauty makeovers in professional places for eternity. Places that cater to men means they’ll know better how to make you look more beautiful than a regular salon. They’ll have the right kinds of makeup and wigs along with breast forms that help you look like a woman. Most of these features will be hard to find in a place that caters to women. Also, the assistants will be experienced in feminizing men and they’ll know how to deal with typical problems like facial hair.



Another advantage is that the assistants in such centers will know all about cross-dressers. They’ll have experience in dealing with them on a day-to-day basis. Specialists will know the special needs that you might keep private. They’ll understand that you might be shy and insecure about dressing like a woman. 

Think of them like a beauty spa, where you get the chance to look your feminine best. And many of them, if not all, also offer photo sessions to capture your prettiest look with a nice background. I strongly recommend that you get some nice photos of yourself when feminized. It’ll be something to show your girlfriend or wife and a nice memory to hold onto.


And finally you might consider the societal benefits. If these places are in demand then there will be more of them soon and that will lower the prices quickly too. Eventually, perhaps feminization will be something offered in many regular beauty salons and spas. I know it sounds like a long way away but you’d be surprised how quickly a market can grow if it catches on.

How Does One Know if They Are a Transgender (MTF)?

Excerpted from: http://heartcorps.com/




1. At what age did you first feel different than other kids of your sex?

For kids with gender disorders, they usually feel that other kids of their sex think in ways they can't comprehend. This usually gets worse throughout the school years.



When I was very young (8-10), it didn't occur to me that I might think like the girls.


Some I've talked to tell me they immediately knew that they were like the girls, and not like the boys, from the first day of school.




It hit me when I was in my teens that I might have a female mind. All through the years, I had sexual fantasies about becoming a girl, having boys like me and daydreaming what it would be like to have a boy kiss me.




In kindergarten, a group of girls used to chase the boys around and try to kiss them. They called themselves the "Kissing Girls." I was one of them in my heart, but didn't want to let others know.


Many times, whewn I was 10-12, I wanted desperately to talk to my mother about my inner desire to be raised as a girl.



And this leads to our second question"

2. Can you recall times when you naturally acted more like a girl than a boy when you were a child?

When looking back, you can see that your outlook and interests were a lot more like the opposite sex than your own born sex.


Those were times when
you were not aware that anything like "sex change" existed.


Today, it's easier. Sex change stories are all over television in both fiction and the news. It may be likely that younger people know all about sex change even before going to kindergarten. I wish it had been that way for me. I might have been raised as a girl - my fondest wish.


These days, even before school age some children are telling their parents they are not a boy or not a girl. They ask questions like "When am I going to get to wear those clothes?" or "When will I get to be a [boy or girl]?"



Can you recall thinking your natural approach to live, or manner of thinking, was much closer to the opposite sex than your born sex?

3. As a child, did you yearn for things appropriate to the opposite sex?

Did you ever envy things girls or women did? Were you ever attracted to items of clothing or jewelry that you thought were pretty? Most cross-dressers, since they are primarily driven by sexual interest, don't start experimenting until puberty. But most transsexuals either begin cross dressing at an early age well before puberty.

A lot of us find clothing or jewelry pretty and want to try it on (dressing up like mommy) but are told we can't because we are boys. We soon learn not to ask because we begin to get reprimanded sternly.



For me, I was about five years old when I was first attracted to female clothing. I wanted something like that for myself. I started cross-
dressing at age seven or eight, secretly trying on my sister's clothes.


Ask yourself if you ever lost the urge to cross dress for perhaps years at a time. Most cross dressers never lose the urge.



After I got married, I continued to cross dress secretly for many years. There were times though, that I thought about gender issues less frequently.


True transsexuals who wait until later in life often do so because their maternal instinct is so strong they yearn for a family more than to be in the right role.
Often, those who change early get a head start because they are more assertive.

Fact is, the age at which someone changes neither validates nor diminishes how "real" they are.

4. Looking back, have you been closer in your feelings toward your male or female relatives?

Boys and men generally aren't really all that close to anyone. Although sensitive and gentle men are not at all necessarily transgendered, most men don't make those kinds of connections.



Male relatives are, therefore, also a bit stand-off-ish. So, take that into account when considering your answer to this question.


But, if you take that into account and find that rather than emulating the attitudes and philosophies of relatives of your born sex, you were in greater empathy with those of the opposite sex, then you are in line with what most transgendered people felt as they grew up.


Doesn't mean I was a feminine kid though. I learned early on to play the game and by the time I decided to transition in my late thirties, it came as a total shock to everyone.


Other friends tell me that when they changed, relatives told them, "well, that makes sense." Again, go figure.


5. Have you had lifelong fantasies of becoming female?

If so, you are either a cross-
dresser, transgendered, or transsexual. All people occasionally fantasize about being the other sex. That's why so many stories are made about that for the mainstream audience. But for it to be a lifelong fantasy, especially to the exclusion of other sexual fantasies, well that pretty well speaks for itself, especially if the fantasies started before puberty. In such a case you are far more likely to be transgendered or transsexual than anything else.

Have your fantasies of being female affected your relationship with a woman? Have you had problems with sex because you viewed yourself as wanting to be her versus making love to her? Men enjoy making love to a woman while many women enjoy being made love to them. 


6. Do you have to be on guard all the time to prevent yourself from falling into feminine poses and movements?

This is a big one -
 one of the best questions to help you sort out if you are really transgendered. Crossdressers tend to naturally move, pose, and act masculinely. When dressed, they have to make an intentional effort to act in a feminine manner.

Men who are transgendered tend to fall automatically into feminine poses and movements all of their lives, even back in school. They have learned how to act in a masculine manner, but even with years of effort, they have to constantly monitor their movements to make sure their arms are held "just so," their legs move with authority, and so on.


In school, someone once told me I walked like a girl. I spent the whole next Summer watching movies with strong male characters and practicing their moves.
A friend's father complained about the way she took off her tee shirt, pulling it up by the sides instead of from the back. Why? because guys and girls do it differently
But WHY do they do it differently? Because male and female bodies are built differently at the skeletal level. Its just easier for each to do it the way they do. Which, is why my friend did it the girls way -
 she had female skeletal features.

Which brings us to our final question:

7. Do you have any physical characteristics that are far too female to be normal?

Transsexuality is believed to be caused by an aberration in the flow of hormones over the brain of the developing fetus during pregnancy. Turns out, that the more intense the mental transgenderism, the greater the female physical attributes as well.



I personally know a lot of transsexuals who had all the surgeries and now look pretty much like women, but they never had the telltale physical characteristics. Every single one of them acts more or less like a man, with male-ish attitudes and perspectives.


So what are these characteristics (so you can look for them in yourself)? Here are a few - smallish hands, narrow, delicate bones overall, wide pelvis compared to shoulders, narrow shoulders compared to men, ring finger and index finger same length (men have a noticeably longer index finger), and then my two personal favorites:


1. Elbows. If you let your arms hang down by your sides and face your palms forward, male physical arms will be almost straight line from shoulder to wrist. Female arms will be straight down to the elbow, but then the arms angle outward, away from the body at about a thirty degree angle.



Why is this? In evolution, the angle makes it far easier to nurse a baby; Male arms can't easily twist into a position to bring the baby to the breast area, while cradling the baby's head in the crook of the elbow.



It is this angle that makes girls throw like girls (and that led my friend to take off her tee-
shirt the way she did).


2. Crossing of legs. We can all cross our legs, but can you double-
cross them? In other words, after you cross your legs, can you then tuck your ankle around again, under the ankle of the leg on the bottom.


Guys can't seem to do this because of the width of the pelvis and the angle at which the legs are attached.

My Girlfriend Turned Me Into a Girl

Excerpted from: http://www.transvestitelounge.com/ 

It started a couple of years ago when my girlfriend wanted me to go as a woman for Halloween. That first night when I dressed up after shaving my legs, wearing a dress, putting on makeup, etc. was so exhilarating. I quickly became addicted to the feminine persona I felt.

I always use a "Woman's" salon to get my hair styled and for the past eight months or so, I've let it grow longer. My GF has always made it more feminine. It's now very close to a pageboy look and I love it. My GF also knows threading and she has trimmed my eyebrows to a thinner feminine style. The Salon also offers manicures and pedicures, so I try to grow my finger nails as long as possible and wear a very light pink color with clear Gel gloss. My toenails are either pink or red Gel. You can't wear a dress and have ugly hairy legs, so I always have them and my entire body waxed every 3 to 4 weeks. It feels great wearing sheer nylons or pantyhose after getting waxed.

I no longer feel shy or embarrassed entering a woman's clothes boutique. There are 2 lingerie stores and 6 boutiques I regularly go to, even in "Male" mode and buy dresses (Size 6 -8), jeans (Small or 26), tops, accessories and the women treat me like a model. The lingerie store fitted me for corsets, bras, padded panties and all the intimates I would need.

When I started Crossdressing a couple of years ago, I purchased a pair of shoes online and was very disappointed, as they didn't fit as well as I hoped and didn't look as good as in the photo. I then found a few local stores that had shoes in large sizes (mine are US 11) and it was so much fun actually trying them out in the store. The owners then ordered certain styles just for me. I now have over 25 pairs of boots, stilettos, sandals, sling-backs from 3 to 5 inches. The only other thing I purchased online was breast forms for my 36C bras.

Recently I began getting facials and body exfoliation....mmmmmm what a treat and last week got my ears pierced. Yesterday I bought some pretty dangly earrings, bracelets, a watch and a few rings.

Anyhow my girlfriend loves my Crossdressing and I've come out of the closet a month ago to go shopping, to the movies and restaurants. For the New Year, I will announce my Crossdressing to my parents and at my work and plan to live 24/7 as a woman.

My girlfriend and I plan to get married next year and hopefully both of us will be a bride.



Dressing, then acting and being a woman has brought out an entirely different and exciting personality compared to the drab person I am as Michael. I have more friends...mostly girls, who love the feminine me. I'm on a new and exciting path in life and will never turn back

My Life as a Husband and a Transgendered Woman

Excerpted From: http://tglife.com/true-trans-stories/

I have been married to the same woman since the middle of 2005, and for the first six years or so I kept my desire to become a woman a secret. But then ...

I have many reasons why I didn't want to tell her, but the biggest reason was that she wouldn't love me and wouldn't want to be with me.

Before my wife and I got married, we dated for two weeks and there was a day that she was talking with one of our co-workers (yeah, we worked together) discussing a program they watched the previous night on Discovery Health Channel regarding transgender and transsexual people. My now wife expressed how disgusted she was, and that is when I really understood on how afraid regular people can be of trans-folk.



So when my wife and I finally decided to work on things in early 2011 we both thought that everything was going to be alright as long as we got marriage therapy, which we shortly began in March of that year.

Then I decided I needed to tell her...it started out by asking her a question, "I need to tell you something that will change our relationship forever. You said when we got married that you'd love me no matter what, right?", her response was positive until she replied, "As long as it's not something like you wanting to be a woman!"

She didn't take the news well. My wife felt I was lying to her for several years. And I didn't understood it was all just a matter of fear.

Since April of 2011 I have been full time woman (sans sexual reassignment surgery... I'll cover that at a later date as to why I don't want to go through with this) and my wife has tried to be as supportive as she can be: she buys me clothes, makeup, hair products... you name it; she will buy me things just out of kindness and sweetness (and I don't even have to ask!!), but she still has a resentment towards me.

We have already come to terms that our marriage won't last much longer, especially since as time goes on she feels more and more uncomfortable out in public. 

My wife kept citing that she was mostly upset about the transitioning because when I start HRT (hormone replacement therapy), I'd become sterile and we wouldn't be able to have anymore kids.

As more time passes and I of course become more passable I can just feel the awkwardness she feels every time we go out in public. Especially when we're together and people say, "Hi Ladies", or some variation of this... she doesn't want people to think she's a lesbian.

As both me and my wife near the end of my second year of being full time female I keep hoping that one day she'll change her mind on this and while she's tryed to be supportive in the past -- by buying me make-up, clothes, and jewelry (she keeps secretly wishing I'd just be a crossdresser) --, I am really afraid of what's going to happen when we're no longer together.